YET ANOTHER 32 WAYS
TO ANNOY PEOPLE:YET ANOTHER 32 WAYS
TO ANNOY PEOPLE:
(you should be getting good at this by now...)
1. Sit in your front yard pointing a hair dryer at passing cars to see if they slow down.
2. Repeat the following conversation a dozen times: "Do you hear that?" "What?" "Never mind, it's gone now."
3. Wander around the restaurant, asking other diners for their parsley.
4. Leave tips in Bolivian currency.
5. At the laundromat, use one dryer for each of your socks.
6. When Christmas carolling, sing "Jingle Bells, Batman smells" until physically restrained.
7. Wear a cape that says "Magnificent One".
8. As much as possible, skip rather than walk.
9. Stand over someone's shoulder, mumbling, as they read.
10. Finish the 99 bottles of beer song.
11. Sing the "This is the song that never ends..." song. (Ya know, from Lamb Chop?)
12. Drive half a block.
13. Inform others that they exist only in your imagination.
14. Ask people what gender they are.
15. Lick the filling out of all the Oreos, and place the cookie parts back in the tray.
16. Cultivate a Norwegian accent. If Norwegian, affect a Southern Drawl.
17. Routinely handcuff yourself to furniture, informing the curious that you don't want to fall off "in case the big one comes".
18. Deliberately hum songs that will remain lodged in co-workers' brains, such as "Feliz Navidad", the Archies' "Sugar Sugar" or the Mr. Rogers theme song.
19. While making presentations, occasionally bob your head like a parakeet.
20. Lie obviously about trivial things such as the time of day.
21. Leave your Christmas lights up and lit until September.
22. Change your name to John Aaaaasmith for the great glory of being first in the phone book. Claim it's a Hawaiian name, and demand that people pronounce each A.
23. Inform everyone you meet of your personal Kennedy assasination/UFO/OJ Simpson conspiracy theories.
24. Chew on pens that you've borrowed.
25. Wear a LOT of cologne.
26. Ask to "interface" with someone.
27. Listen to 33rpm records at 45rpm speed, and claim the faster speed is necessary because of your "superior mental processing".
28. Sing along at the opera.
29. Mow your lawn with scissors.
30. At a golf tournament, chant "swing-batatatatatata-suhWING-batter!"
31. Ask the waitress for an extra seat for your "imaginary friend".
32. Go to a poetry recital and ask why each poem doesn't rhyme.
Got an annoying habit that should be listed here? Tell us about it!
To view other people's annoying entries so far, go to our ORIGINAL 32 Ways To Annoy People page...and if that's not enough for you, check out our 32 MORE Ways To Annoy People page!!
