"This new one we're tracking is the size of Texas..."      

ARMAGEDDON (PG-13) 

Reviewed July 4, 1998 - Check out the Armageddon web site.

It wasn't that long ago that our Earth faced the unwelcome arrival of a large celestial body in Deep Impact, and lo and behold, here we go again.  In Deep Impact it was a comet, and in Armageddon it's an asteroid, but the end result is the same.  A "global killer" is what it's called...with an impact so powerful that it would instantly burn or drown half the Earth's population, and leave the other half to freeze to death in a thousand-year cloudcover of dust.  With only eighteen days before impact, NASA Director Dan Truman (Billy Bob Thornton) recruits a highly-skilled but undisciplined drilling crew headed by Harry Stamper (Bruce Willis) to save the world.  Their mission: take a couple of space shuttles up to the asteroid, dig an 800-foot hole, and detonate a nuclear warhead in that hole in order to split the asteroid in half, changing its trajectory and causing it to miss our little blue planet.

Simple, right?  Notwithstanding the fact that Stamper and his crew have no experience in space, and that Stamper is not on best terms with his lead crewman A.J. (Ben Affleck), who just happens to be in love with Stamper's daughter Grace (Liv Tyler), the crew decides to go forward with the plan.  Oh, the pressures of saving the world.

Directed by Michael Bay and produced by Jerry Bruckheimer, Armageddon is a film that makes no pretense about what it's about.  Namely, it's about special effects, it's about big action sequences, it's about blowing things up, and it's about making lots of noise.  LOTS of noise.  From beginning to end, Armageddon feels like it's running on fast-forward, going from scene to scene and plotline to plotline without hardly a pause.  The only real goal, it seems, is to squeeze as many action sequences as possible in a two and a half hour movie, and on this count Armageddon definitely succeeds.  The special effects are, as you'd expect, excellent, with a number of sequences (the initial asteroid shower, the destruction of Paris...) being particularly memorable.  If this is what you're looking for, Armageddon's for you.  Unfortunately, as with many films of this type, character development and dialog really do suffer, and you'll find the same here.  Still, for what it's worth Armageddon is a somewhat entertaining film, and a better one than its comet-hits-Earth predecessor Deep Impact.  Let's just hope that our Earth (and our theaters) can get a break from all these massive flying rocks for a while...

Responses from cyberspace--thanks for writing!

josie gives this movie  stars. (5/27/01)

Eoakwell@BTInternet.com gives this movie  stars: "Excellent special Effects, but is boring and the acting is dull " (12/12/00)

rfksecond@cs.com gives this movie  stars: "Not as good as Deep Impact. Better action and effects, though. Problem...after problem...after problem...and...hey! Wait? Do we have any [insert space tool her] left? I think I have a plan! That's basically the movie but it's better than I'm making it sound." (6/17/00)

David Rogers gives this movie  star: "This is (without a doubt) THE WORST MOVIE EVER! The acting stood out, the FX were cheesey, and the costumes looked like they were going to fall apart! And don't get me started on the script! Godzilla's phrase may have been "Size Does Matter", but this film stole it and put it to evil use by giving the movie an unnecessary overlong running time. If any movie out there wants the title of THE WORST MOVIE EVER, be careful, this is a tough opponent!" (4/27/00)

jessfroggy@prodigy.net gives this movie  stars: "this movie sucked daddy gimme a break the ending was so phony i wanted to barf. i wish the asteroid would of hit and the whole cast" (8/18/99)

enranca@kabelfoon.nl gives this movie  stars: "2 stars for the movie. 3 stars for the soundtrack. 5 stars for ARMAGEDDON!!!!" (6/24/99)

piedra@pcsrock.com gives this movie  stars: "This movie sucked, too much for the FX, too little for Science, the only recoverable part is the soundtrack..." (6/4/99)

MrsStephanie86@yahoo.com gives this movie  stars: "It was the best movie I had ever seen.It me cry everyme I seen it!" (4/24/99)

harrin62@ops2.ops.org says: "I thought that it was the best movie and should have been given a better rating." (1/26/99)

sls1510@aol.com gives this movie  stars. (1/16/99)

gbfansc@hotmail.com gives this movie  stars. (12/17/98)

d-park@cornell-iowa.edu gives this movie  stars: "If there were a no star rating I would've given the movie that. The film could've been called Con Air in space, with all the reliance on the same character personas used over and over and over again in all of Bruckheimer's films. The acting was horrible, except for Billy Bob Thorton, who looked as if he were lost in the the land of the stupid. Someone explain to me why a machine gun is needed in outer space. What? Are there terrorists waiting on the asteroid? This movie proved that machoisms and special effects can't hold up a film." (12/10/98)

green47976@aol.com gives this movie  stars: "Armageddon was the best asteroid/comet movie I ever saw because it has a lot of action." (11/16/98)

George Davitos gives this movie  stars: "It was a good movie a very good movie with fantastic special effects but I didn't like Bruce Willis." (9/25/98)

George gives this movie  stars. (9/24/98)

andersch@eglin.af.mil gives this movie  stars: "best movie ever!!!!!!!!!!" (9/23/98)

sbeirne@nsw.bigpond.net.au gives this movie  stars. (9/23/98)

jboff@mail.utexas.edu gives this movie  stars: "This movie is awesome. I saw the very first showing at 12:01 in the morning on July 1 and I loved it so much I went two days later to see it again." (9/22/98)

vanwingk@river.it.gvsu.edu gives this movie  stars: "I thought the movie was a great romantic action pact film. It was a good movie to see with friends. I highly recommend it to anyone who is looking for a date film. It's a must see." (9/21/98)

tessbaby@hotmail.com gives this movie  stars: "it was a great movie. Lots of action. And very sad. I loved it. And the acting was excellent!!!" (9/15/98)

stone cold#2 gives this movie  stars: "This movie had awsome special effects. Twords the end you did not know what was going to happen. I give it two thubs up."  (9/9/98)

stacymetz@netscape.com gives this movie  stars: "I thought this movie was the best! It is a must see!" (9/5/98)

little3eyes@yahoo.com gives this movie  stars: "Great effects and great cast! Is the meteor shower possible to happen in real life? And is it possible for the drillers to go to the outerspace? please e-mail me at little3eyes@yahoo.com for the answers to my questions. Thanks!" (9/3/98)

macklin@pivot.net gives this movie  stars: "This movie is a global killer!! It is a very good movie for everybody to see! I would reccomand that you se it and buy the movie when it comes out on video!" (8/29/98)

Mach It gives this movie  stars: "I think it had outstanding effects. The movie gives suspence and you don't really know what could be sneeking up on you next! Two thumbs way up!!" (8/27/98)

marder@inter.net.il gives this movie  stars: "This movie was so great, i loves it very much! And if u read this and u didn't see the movie yet...go see it now!!! Steve Buscemi was great in this movie like he us in all his moives!!! I love u Steve!!" (8/25/98)

twister234@rocketmail.com gives this movie  stars: "This movie is a must see, the acting was great along with the plot. I would say I liked it even better then Titanic." (8/25/98)

jgrasmick@grasmick.com gives this movie  stars: "I thought "Armageddon" was a movie of epic poporions and not just three or two stars but mabey four. It was a funny and couragious." (8/20/98)

Dave gives this movie  stars: "Stupid is stupid does. And this movie proves it." (8/1/98)

nickblaskowski@hotmail.com gives this movie  stars: "Better than the other recent asteroid movie,Deep Impact!But working with NASA,Apollo 13 was much much better!I liked this one alot!But not enough to call it 5 stars.I liked the cast,I liked the ending!What I didn't like was that these guys were oildrillers trying to save the world!No education in being an astronaut.......let's just say that I wouldn't want these guys saving the world in real life!" (7/25/98)

Adam Tremaine gives this movie  stars: "Well thought out touching movie with good acting and great special effects" (7/22/98)

A Girl gives this movie  stars: "I liked this movie a lot! And I'm not a big action fan. Maybe it's dumb, but I thought the ending was sweet. I would say my favorite parts but I don't want to give it away to anyone who hasn't seen it." (7/7/98)

Armageddon gives this movie  stars: "What a great movie tha Special FX was tight! A Must See Of the Summer!" (7/4/98)